I squirmed in my seat, impatiently waiting for the Cohn brothers’ movie, Fargo, to end. I couldn’t believe how AWFUL it was. I stayed only because I thought it had to get better. As I walked out of the theater, I was greeted by friends who exclaimed, “Wasn’t that FUN?!” “Fun” was definitely not my perspective on this movie. But what if I could change my perspective? How would I experience Fargo if I looked at it through the lens of “fun?”
I could laugh at the absurdity of the situation, and appreciate that the directors put the gruesome scene of chopping up a body alongside what should have been a beautiful encounter, so we would be sure to see the characters’ lack of connection to their emotions. I could marvel at Frances McDormand’s brilliant performance (she did win an Oscar for it, after all) and wonder at the many ways in which life gets out of hand. There are so many aspects of the movie that I could have enjoyed.
In the same way, most of our experiences in life can be looked at from a number of perspectives. Just as a cut jewel will reflect the light differently as it passes through another facet, viewing a person, place, object, or event from another perspective will show us a different color, evoke a different feeling, and open a new – and perhaps more helpful – way of seeing things.
Do you groan each time a new journal arrives, knowing it will only add to the “unread” pile? Do you dread having to tell a dear patient about a new diagnosis? Concerned about confronting a receptionist about the way she interacts with patients?
In each of those situations, we are affected by our current perspective – one that shows us only a negative view. Maybe we feel buried by the journals, as if we are stuck in a hole and every time we try to dig ourselves out, more dirt falls on top of us. With our patient, we might be sad about what we believe will be the unhappy outcome, and lack confidence in our ability to provide answers or a cure. We might feel as if we are backed up to a cliff, with no escape route. With our receptionist, it might seem as if we are on a tightrope, worried about saying the wrong thing and being left with an even worse situation – so we’re afraid to even move.
But if we viewed our journals as if we were a mountain climber, we might realize that a mountain is scaled in individual steps, by placing each foot into individual crevices that appear as we look ahead. In the same way, we might see that we have 10 minutes here or there in our day during which we can read one article, thus managing to get through each journal within a week or two. A great perspective from which to view the discussion with our patient might be that of Mother Theresa, who felt that providing respect and love, even in the face of incurable illness, was the greatest gift she could offer the many people she cared for. And what about contemplating the conversation with our receptionist through the perspective of a door? Just as doors open to new opportunities and experiences, is it possible that our conversation might introduce her to new and more effective ways of interacting that will actually make her job more enjoyable for her?
Perspectives can be drawn from people we know (how would your grandparent view a troublesome situation in your life?), our heroes, members of other generations (a child’s perspective is frequently quite empowering) or can even be on the silly side. I have found terrific ideas from considering the pizza perspective on things! (Pizzas are a whole made up of small, unrelated delicious items. In the same way, my life might be more delicious if it contained a variety of short experiences, rather than insisting that I spend an inordinate amount of time on each activity.) As you play with new perspectives, you will find ideas that don’t fit for you. With others, you may suddenly realize a new, exciting, and satisfying way of living your life – and you’ll wonder why you didn’t see it before. After all, it was there all the time…you just needed to shift your perspective.